Damages (A Poem)

There are some sorrows, some damages, for which
there is no compensation;
you are that irreparable loss of mine.
Where you cast your glance
light of the conjoining stars dances
along the great longitude;
the courage to dream blooms in the blood
and the difficult habit of staying alive,
nurtured from the moment of birth,
crumbles like conch-shell dust.
You are that inconsolable sorrow of mine
that tears apart this neat and tidy day-to-day existence.

Someday this present time
will slip out of my grasp
like a fisherman missing on the high seas.
The still lighthouse’s flickering beam of light
will tremble only on the vast deep,
dark waters of the sea—a wounded wind;
and there will go on lying my boundless time—
my destiny!

There are some sorrows, some calamities—
that can never, from any quarter, be compensated for.


By Ruby Rahman

Photo by Nirrimi Joy

...

How odd. I just discovered that exactly a year ago, I posted another entry called "Damages." It's strange how intuitive time can be. I'm anticipating today being hard on me emotionally, but also an important time to reflect and send good thoughts and lots of love to a specific person (Thank you, Eat Pray Love). A year has passed since the last second Wednesday of May, and that year feels like more than a year. It feels so distant. And I feel like a different person. Different in a good way. But I'm also frustrated with where I find myself in life. It sucks to be dissatisfied with the way your life is going. Guhhh, sorry to be so cryptic and gloomy. It will pass, I promise :)