Friday, May 27, 2011

Man Tips From Allie

Dear Man*,

I can't stress how great it is when you smell good. It's not a necessity for general attraction, but daaaaamn, can I get a what-WHAT from the ladies on the subject of guys who smell good?! ("what WHAT!") Of course, this doesn't mean you must bathe in all Axe products. Eff NO, dudes. Us cool girls (you know, the ones you should be paying attention to rather than those lame skanks you think you can carry on a conversation with) can smell that shit from a mile away, and guess what the scrolly prompter in our minds reads: "D-bag alert, D-bag alert, D-bag alert." Yeah, scents like Axe are equivalent to trying too hard. You see, smelling good isn't hard to do. Step one: Go in a shower and use a simple bar soap such as Irish Springs. The scent will lightly linger on your body but WE. WILL. NOTICE. That's just how we're wired. We notice little things. Step two: After shower, apply deodorant. Old Spice is preferable. THAT'S IT! I swear to howdy. I hope this was a helpful lesson in bagging an awesome babe, all you guys who read my blog.**

*Meaning, heterosexual male populations
** No guys read my blog.


wildchild said...

amennn. using some good simple soap is the best thing a man can do for his bod.

a day with kate said...

haha this is amazing. specifically, the asterisks.

totally agree though.