So, I've been harboring a crush for a little while. This guy has the body of a Disney prince. He's also really nice. And a little mysterious. His speaking voice is one of the sexiest things I've ever heard. I can't tell you any more details, because what if you know him??!!
Which brings me to my point: Wow, crushes are so stupid. I feel like I'm in high school again! My awkward, orthodontia-ed, pasty, high school self, daydreaming about dudes that I've barely even spoken to. Like Ian, the senior to my freshman, who sang "Yesterday" by The Beatles at the talent show. And Kelly, the linebacker to my cheerleader. Or Alex, the brooding theatre geek to my geeky theatre geek. Yeah, high school was so fun for me.
But I really haven't had an actual crush-- the kind that's most likely never to be requited-- on a guy since my last year of college. Not that since then I've been knee-deep in penis or anything (because that would be DISGUSTING. BLAH, WHY DID I EVEN WRITE THAT), but I did start dating more frequently around that time, and was also in a year-and-a-half long relationship, and also didn't really have anyone in my life that deserved my serious pining-afters. Because, when it comes down to it, crushes are a fucking waste of time. I've never had a crush on a guy that's liked me back. Which totally sucks, because you really do think the world of that person, and your life seems to be filled with disappointing missed chances and missed glances. A lot of "wishful makeuping," to borrow a term from Pretty in Pink.
On the other hand, crushes can also be a lot of fun. There's excitement in anticipating seeing that person at a social get-together, hoping that maybe this time they'll see something in you that they hadn't before, sparking romantic feelings. Even if it's a small gesture, like a friendly side hug or an intimate joke between the two of you, it makes your evening spent at a dark and noisy bar totally worth it. Right, ladies?
The truth is, I'm 25. Not 16. And I don't feel like spending energy trying to be the ideal girl for a guy I'm not even sure I would be compatible with (you know, once making out gets old). I'd much rather be my weird, awesome, sassy, dorky self and hope that some guy out there will find those qualities attractive.
10 comments :
I find that I enjoy a crush for the first week or so and then I hate it if it's not mutual (torture! agony!) and then, mutual or not, I progress into annoying myself with how constantly I think about said person. Sometimes I feel silly about having a crush because it feels a bit juvenile and I feel like, shouldn't I be more...mature? hard to get? careful? less blindly optimistic? something?
But you're right about how interacting with a crush can change how you feel in a millisecond.
You're a genius. Sums up my feelings about crushes... I'm usually good at controlling mine, but I have a few friends who let them get out of hand. More about your crush, I'm positive I won't know him. But, then again, the world is a small place!
this may be one of your bests post ever.
As long as crushes remain just what they are--crushes--and not infatuations...you're good to go. A fav friend of mine once said, "Crushes are a reason to get up in the morning." They're a burst of excitement in the mundane. I fully support them...and God knows I NEEVVVVVEERRRRR let them get out of hand :)
I also support the "smush"...aka the small crush. Those are lighthearted and awesome...and my high school small group girls made it up.
Yeah, the whole knee-deep in peen was a bit much. Not a great mental picture there.
In the past, I've been known to harbor a crush or two and let them get out of hand. I have a friend whose crushes turn into smother-parties and then he gets all bent out of shape about the girl ignoring him because she's frightened. So I learn from his mistakes. It's been a while since I've had a full-on crush, I guess in terms of the high school definition, but I don't rule out the idea of a genuinely harmless and wonderful crush. I think that type of crush happens when there's some reciprocated feelings. I mean, who would want a sig (significant other) that doesn't have a crush on them? And who would want to be with someone they don't have a crush on? While I do believe that you can't have a successful relationship without work, I also believe that you can't have a successful relationship without crushes.
To quote The Eels: "Do you know what it's like to care too much, 'bout someone that you're never gonna get to touch? Hey Man, now you're really living". That's from they're song "Hey Man". You should give it a listen. There is something to be said about a crush that doesn't amount to anything. It assures you that you're not a sociopath.
I really like Orange Crush, as well.
Haha, yes, Orange Crush is great.
Cute song! Thanks for sharing.
I agree with you; believe me, I've had "crushy" feelings on guys in the past (specifically thinking of the only person I've ever fallen in love with). Crushy feelings are AMAZING. As long as they don't get too out of hand... :)
you are the cutest. this was the best post. knee deep in penis, baaaahahahahahahahah i died laughing.
and i feel you allie. i do. i'm seriously the crushing champion. right now i totes like this boy named Max...i've liked him for a long time :) But before that crush started, i seriously had a crush on anyone and everyone, not because i wanted to actually date those people, but its just kinda nice to be able to daydream or just enjoy that silly butterfly tummy feeling every so often.
you go get your crush on. its fun. to me it is way more exciting having a quiet crush than making out with random people. I love the daydreams and the longing more than random hook ups with people i dont care about.
i've always been super duper shy, especially with boys i like. and i immediately put up a cold front when i like someone, hurtling myself into the friend zone immediately. damn. but oooohhhh well. I really think it is better for the heart to have a bazillion crushes and less actual relationships than a shit ton of relationships that wreck your heart over and over. Crushes keep it light. So crush away my love. Just have fun with it. Daydreams are a girls best friend.
love you.
moo
hahaha knee deep in penis. ga-ross. but awesome. crushes are cute. they're fun and flirty and make you feel good about yourself. sometimes.
Crushes are so much fun! I don't worry about getting hurt cuz if the guys not into me I move on!
I am super late to this post because I was sick, but I LOVED it. I haven't had a crush on someone I actually KNOW since 2007. Since then it's only been famous men. Not *because* they're famous but because they are the men I spend the most time with...anyway. My word verification? "Marry." What a wonderful 'fuck you' from blogger. :)
Post a Comment