No, Snooki. No.

Do you like tofu? I do! I mean, I don't love it, but I think it's pretty good. I've never cooked with it before until a couple days ago when I made "Green-Packed Stir Fry" from Super Natural Cooking. It mostly worked out, except that I couldn't find hoison sauce at the market! So I just used a general stir fry sauce instead. Also I did not use red chilies, because a) they were super-expensive and b) I was afraid!!! So I used red chili flakes instead. Same thing, right? Anyway, the dish is really flavorful and healthy... I couldn't believe I ate a meal absent of both dairy and carbs! So not my style. Fatty.

INGREDIENTS
8 ounces extra-firm tofu
3 cloves garlic, minced
5 green onions, chopped
1 (1-inch) piece fresh ginger, peeled and minced
3 small red chilies, seeded and chopped
½ pound asparagus, trimmed and cut diagonally into 1-inch slices
About 1/3 cup cashews, coarsely chopped
3 cups packed spinach leaves, stemmed
Grated zest and juice of 1 lime
2 tablespoons hoisin sauce
1 small handful fresh mint leaves, stemmed and slivered
1 small handful fresh basil leaves, stemmed and slivered
2 teaspoons sesame oil, divided
2 teaspoons vegetable oil, divided
About ¼ teaspoon fine sea salt or kosher salt, or to taste

DIRECTIONS
1. Cut the tofu into strips about 1 inch long and as thick as a pencil. Spread onto a paper-towel-lined plate. Prepare and measure garlic, green onions, ginger, chilies, asparagus, cashews, spinach, lime zest and juice, hoisin, and mint and basil leaves.

2. Heat a large nonstick skillet or wok over medium-high. When pan is hot, add a teaspoon each of sesame and vegetable oils. When oil is hot, add tofu and cook about 2 minutes or until golden. Remove from pan.

3. Add remaining oils to pan. Heat, then add garlic, green onions, ginger, chilies and asparagus. Stir 1 to 2 minutes, depending on thickness of asparagus. Add cashews and spinach, stirring for another minute, or until the spinach wilts and collapses. Return tofu to pan. Stir in lime zest and about a tablespoon juice; stir in hoisin sauce. Cook another minute, stirring constantly. Taste and add a little more lime juice if needed.

4. Remove from heat and stir in mint and basil. Season with enough salt to make the flavors pop, starting with a few generous pinches. Serve immediately.